The Contradictions

While I decide to go the other way

Something pulls me, interrupts my decision

There I wish to live and find a purpose

Here, I have comprehended the futility

Whether I am being pushed or pulled, I know not

On who is behind the contradictions

Above restlessness, it is a continuous struggle

Difficult distancing myself from both realities

While I sit here exasperated and tired

Trying to create a permanent demarcation

Like everyone, I wake up, nudged by time

The weariness still holds on to me

Dual reflections and then hallucination

As if they are conspiring behind me

Trying to flummox the half-sleepy being

Forcing me to believe the indistinct truth

From some sense to perpetual nothingness

A fearful and surreal chasm I face

~Amitav

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